A Request for Suggestions

[whotheheckami]

A number of people on my Flist seem to need to find new and effective ways to rid themselves of aggression. Many moons ago chaoshedgerow and myself developed an extremely satisfactory method of achieving this with the judicious introduction of shotguns to watermelons. I would love to create this but seem to be short of a shotgun and associated firearms certificate. However, all is not lost as I am the proud owner of chainsaw! Consequently, I intend to offer Whotheheckami's Aggression Relief Service at my birthday party!

I'll provide the chainsaw and you provide the fruit salad – or you could comment with a photo of what you would like to chainsaw back to its component atoms!

Please note that no cute and cuddly ickle puppies or kitties will be harmed in the release of any aggression - probably! ;@)

Comments

[ev1ldonut.livejournal.com]

See, personally I'd prefer a bloody great axe or similar. I don't want a machine doing most of the destroying work for me. Half of it is the sheer physical exhertion of destruction for me. ;)

[snowyfeline.livejournal.com]

pity i haven't bought a broadsword yet :D

[ev1ldonut.livejournal.com]

I have my own sword (as you know *grin*). But Even a sword is a bit to "surgical"...

I want big, heavy and clumsy. A big axe, or sledgehammer.

Ooooh...

I want to take a sledgehammer to a yard of dead cars, I want to destroy an old car!!

[whotheheckami.livejournal.com]

I've got a clumpy old wood-axe and a hand axe available should you wish to use them.

[adela-terrell.livejournal.com]

I have a number of different weighted swords and an axe... actually someone remind me why I'm letting this man breed?

[whotheheckami.livejournal.com]

PMSL :@)

[alexmc.livejournal.com]

> rid themselves of aggression

I was thinking of taking a massage course

[whotheheckami.livejournal.com]

Done that, it worked; but now I need to damage stuff! :@)

[catinsea.livejournal.com]

Plastic sheeting to be provided??????

For the guests?

[whotheheckami.livejournal.com]

Are you suggesting it to protect them from splaff and spaltter or wrap the bits of the guests up in afterwards?

[catinsea.livejournal.com]

At first I thought the splaff, but then . . .

[whotheheckami.livejournal.com]

If you think we're dangeropus you should read latexiron's journal.

[catinsea.livejournal.com]

You are right. Latexiron is a wee more dangerous. Sooty nostrils and all.

Be afraid....

[whotheheckami.livejournal.com]

EEspecially....this and this

[watervole.livejournal.com]

Having had a son go on a chainsaw training and safety course that took 3 days, there's no way I'd go near anyone using one without a chainsaw certificate. The safety clothing is serious stuff and the potential accidents are horrendous.

[whotheheckami.livejournal.com]

But it's art darling ;@)

In the words of Marlon Brando...

[sarah-mum.livejournal.com]

The horror, the horror!


I agree with the 'donut. Blunt instruments are the way to go with fruit. Criket bat and kiwi fruit would seem a pleasing combination.